February 7th 2021 - THE WEEK THAT WAS WITH THE RETURN OF DODO AND SOME DODGY STATISTICS, A MIS-INFORMED BOJO AND A WONDER ON MANIPULATION.
It would appear that my worry last week, check it out, about the honesty of Pretty Petal and speaking to hotels may not have been misplaced. It turns out that hotel
bosses were saying mid-week that they have not yet had any discussions with government about providing rooms for all these people we are quarantining when they arrive
in the UK.
BOJO said on Wednesday that there would be an announcement on Thursday but later No. 10 said he had been misinformed. I said he was wrong. It seems the
announcement will now be made this coming week, should this coming week ever arrive (in government speak that is). Luckily MAHA, (Health Secretary) said the
government was working "at pace". Luckily, for the government, he did not, of course, specify what pace.
There has also been a bit of a problem with border checks in Northern Ireland this week all because of that wonderful Northern Ireland protocol in the EU
withdrawal treaty. Threats, by way of graffiti, have been made against those making the checks and both the EU and the British government have, at the moment, had
to suspend these checks. Now far be it for me to suggest that Arlene Foster, of the DUP, who has stated quite plainly that the protocol should be re-negotiated
(her speak for removed) would even consider encouraging supporters to paint these slogans, but it seems to have worked for the moment as checks have been
abandoned. Non-incidents have happened before and I'd hate there to be a Giap in the truth. By the way talking of incitement (were we?), how is Trump's impeachment
hearing going?
I'm afraid I must also return again to the question of statistics. Dodo Harding and her bunch at Test and Trace have been accused of relying on "dodgy"
statistics although I prefer to believe the statistics are fine it is the way Dodgy Dodo and her team have presented them that is wrong. Dodo told MPs this
week that her Test and Trace unit had cut the R number by up to 0.6 and was on track to cut it by 0.8 in high prevalence areas of the UK.
However a load of statisticians and academics have spotted that her boast is calculated by comparing the service's impact with what would happen if no one
self-isolated upon getting symptoms of the virus. Not only that but Test and Trace actually admits that 90% of its claimed cut in transmission comes from people
who isolate as soon as they get symptoms, even before coming into contact with the service. Many now feel that Test and Trace appears to be relying on dodgy
statistics to justify its colossal twenty two billion pound budget. Later Dodo was asked if she had been misleading Parliament with the claims and she said she would publish the
technical detail of the model they used to get these figures within the next fortnight.
Finally, another issue with the BBC. They have a very nice Head of Statistics who comes on sometimes and explains things. He may be a very good statistician
but if he oversees the BBC output of statistics then he is not a good communicator. This appeared this week:-
As of last year, more than half of the armed forces - nearly 80,000 people - were occupying single living accommodation blocks, either on a full or
part-time basis. Of those, the NAO (National Audit Office) found more than a third - 36% - were living in "poorer grade" accommodation, while almost 2,400 were
in housing considered such bad quality that they were not charged any rent.
Fewer than half - 49% - were satisfied with the overall standard of their accommodation, compared with 58% in 2015, according to the armed forces continuous
attitude survey.
First point why say 36% for one figure and 2,400 for another. Unless you do the maths it is not possible to compare. By the way it means 3% live in housing
so bad they are not charged rent. Second point 49% of 80,000 were satisfied in 2020 while in 2015 58% of ..............oh we don't know. Meaningless figures yet again. Grump, grump, grump, grump.
February 14th 2021 - THE WEEK THAT WAS WITH THE PAPERS TELLING WHAT BORIS MIGHT DO SO THAT BORIS DOES IT.
Only a short moan this week and it stems from the headlines in today's, Sunday, papers. In my day, you knew that would happen some time didn't you, these white
pieces of paper with printing on were called newspaper. Today they seem to have taken a leaf, possibly a branch, maybe a whole bloody tree out of dear old
Nostradamus's book.
They know everything. They know when all schools will return, they know when non-essential retail will re-open, they can even tell us when we will be sitting
in the pub garden having a nice drink. They know exactly what and when the government will do things.
However, having watched our government and BOJO very carefully this last year I can be almost certain that these papers do not know. Why? Because I honestly
don't think BOJO and his minions actually have any idea what they will do on February 22nd, or the week beginning February 22nd or indeed any month with the 22nd
in it. I know what they want to do, they know what they want to do but they also know doing it might be a big risk. I think Nostradacre and his friends may
sincerely believe that if they print something will happen, the government will be too scared to lose their support and will do it. In that respect I fear those
papers may be correct. I apologise if I have misspoke or been too dumb to understand what was said to me which may be the same thing.
February 21st 2021 - THE WEEK THAT WAS WITH THE ROAD NOT TAKEN LIKELY TO BE LESS FROSTY.
Well what will it be? All this week the Nostradacres mentioned last week have been telling what the road map will look like, when we can sit in pub gardens
with six friends, when children can return to infections, sorry schools, and all manner of other things.
As I write this early Sunday afternoon, BOJO is having a final meeting to finalise his "roadmap" out of lock-down. How many right turns, how many U-turns, how
many dead ends, will the uphills be 1-in-4 and how many churches with a tower. Where are the ancient monuments (the COVID Recovery Group of Harpoon and Biker),
sites of historical interest (Lord Heseltine, although he disliked the BREXIT roadmap) and will BOJO's "roadmap" need a hard shoulder for the unlawful actions of the
Health Secretary to be parked on. The biggest question of all will be how quickly can the cabinet put up a diversion sign should the road mapped out not be working.
I've decided to take a leaf out of the Nostradacre's book and predict that on Monday morning, before BOJO announces to Parliament and the nation, hopefully in
that order, what route we are going to take, nearly every paper's headlines tomorrow will tell you what will be announced, how happy or unhappy Professor Chris Witty
is, whether it was all Carrie's idea and all manner of other matters spoken with no factual knowledge, much hearsay and a fair degree of attempted brainwashing.
As I said, what will it be? Robert Frost would have loved to know which road the PM will take but which meaning would it be? I think we should all remember
that roads are man-made so a roadmap, by definition, must follow a man-made road someone else has built. Whatever the choice, by calling it a roadmap, BOJO is
ready to blame someone else for whatever decision has been made.
February 28th 2021 - THE WEEK THAT WAS AND WE ALL KNEW IT WOULD BE, EVEN IN THE TINIEST HAMLET.
The world, democracy and government are very different today than when I was young. Last week I grumped about the fact that almost every paper and every media
outlet knew what the PM would tell the House of Commons and later the general public before he opened his mouth. I was correct. We no longer respect the House of
Commons as a seat of government, it's just a place where, once everyone else knows something, the government are allowed to tell our elected representatives.
This week we have the budget on Wednesday. In my youth, everyone waited to hear what the Chancellor would tell the House and later we would all watch what he
said. If I remember correctly Sir Gerald Nabarro, one time MP for Kidderminster and later South Worcestershire, would arrive first to make sure he had his place to
hear the speech. I have a recollection that his attire was rather dated and formal but I may have imagined that. There was always speculation as to what might be
in the red box.
This Wednesday, providing she has had half an ear to the media and half an eye on the newspaper, Gladys Plimpton, chief carer at Battersea Dog's Home could
probably give the Budget Speech. By the way I made that name and job up and I apologise completely if there is a Gladys Plimpton working at Battersea Dog's Home
or should I just say I misspoke.
Rest assured the only excitement will be what liquid is in the glass that the Chancellor will no doubt sip from during his speech although I bet the nostradacres
know that too. Modern life is so boring, devoid of any excitement through not knowing something and lacking any need to invent something to do because Netflix
(by non-royal appointment), Amazon Prime, Disney or some other media company will have something on their channels for you to sit on your backsides and watch.
Of course they don't know what it is your glass while you watch but, in my experience of these outlets, I would suggest a strong sedative.
To view or not to view, that is the question,
Whether it is nobler in the mind
To subscribe to yet another outrageous channel
Or take arms against a sea of drivel
And by opposing end them.
This is where the sedative is served by the maid (there was always a maid or a nurse)
To die, to sleep, To sleep, perchance to Dream;
Aye, where's the remote for in this plethora of drudge
Then that can give us pause, or stop
And shuffle off this immoral trash
That makes us fear of so long a mini-series.
